When Anel D’Souza, 43, left his wife, two children, and mother in Karnataka, India, to work in Israel 11 years ago, he didn’t imagine he would end up in a war zone. He certainly didn’t imagine that he would become part of a hostage family.
After working for different families in Rishon LeZion and Netanya, D’Souza began working for the Kupershtein family three years ago—Tal, Julie, and their five children. Tal Kupershtein had been seriously injured in a car accident while working as a paramedic, and he required daily support. Alongside D’Souza, Bar, the eldest of the children, devoted his life to caring for his father and bringing in money to replace the income his father was no longer able to earn.
On October 7, 2023, Bar had been working as a security guard at the Nova festival. That morning, Julie woke D’Souza up at 6:30. “She asked me to call Bar because there were sirens and she was observing Shabbat,” he recounted. “I called him, and after six rings, he answered. I asked him, ‘Bar, where are you?’ and he said, ‘I’m on my way home.’ That was the last thing we heard from him.”
At 11:00 a.m., D’Souza and the family saw a video of Bar lying on the ground with a rope around his neck, and they realized he had been kidnapped.
“In the years I’ve been in Israel, I haven’t heard so many alarms,” D’Souza said. “I was scared. Every minute and every second was terrible. I was very, very afraid.”
D’Souza feels a strong bond with Bar, especially since he’s been living in his room for the past three years—Bar moved in with his grandparents after Tal’s accident to allow D’Souza to have a private room in the house. “Bar is like my brother,” he said. “I feel that he’s not here. I think of him with hope that he will return to his family.”
D’Souza joined the Kupershtein family a year after Tal’s accident, a year during which the family tried to cope with the very challenging situation on their own. “With five children, it’s very difficult,” he said. “And after Bar was kidnapped, it became even harder because Bar helped and took responsibility for everything Tal did until the accident. Bar is a very strong person. He works hard. He even went to work on Shabbat to support his family. I feel that it’s truly by the grace of God that I met this family. I love them very much; they are very, very nice and kind.”
In the year since Bar’s kidnapping, D’Souza and the family have oscillated between hope and despair.
“In the first month, Tal and Julie didn’t want to eat or drink. I invited them to eat, but they didn’t want to,” he said. “One morning during that time, I heard Julie crying and screaming in the shower. Tal didn’t understand who was screaming, and since it’s very hard for him to express himself, he screamed too. It was very sad.”
D’Souza’s connection to the Kupershtein family has only gotten stronger over the past year. He recounts moments of laughter shared with Tal and a shared rush to the stairwell during rocket sirens—for now, that’s all the protection they have.
“October 7, I spent most of my time with Tal at home, in the air conditioning. Now we go everywhere together,” D’Souza said. “Every Saturday evening, we go to a demonstration here in Holon, and on Wednesdays, I accompany Tal for a whole day at Hostages Square. We went to pray at the Western Wall; two weeks ago, we flew with other families to a synagogue in Romania.”
Despite the emotional challenges Tal is facing, he’s made significant strides in his recovery. D’Souza accompanies him to physical therapy four times a week. “In recent months, he’s made significant progress,” he said. “I never dreamed I’d see him standing alone, with no one helping him, like he did at the synagogue in Romania. It’s truly a miracle. A real miracle. This is the first time in three years that I’ve seen him like that.”
D’Souza has accompanied the Kupershteins throughout their entire journey this past year. Other relatives of hostages have treated him like part of the family, he said. “I’ve especially connected with Eli, the father of Idan Shtivi, who was also kidnapped from the party,” he noted. “He was with us in Romania.”
Back home in India, D’Souza’s family is worried about him. “Since October 7, my mother asks me every day how I am and what’s happening,” he said. “I tell her everything is fine. They suffer a lot; I don’t tell them what’s really happening here because they worry about me a lot.”
A religious Christian, D’Souza trusts his faith to help him. “Every morning and every night, I pray for Bar and for all the hostages to return to their families and be happy,” he said.
A particularly challenging moment for D’Souza and the Kupershtein family was when news broke of the six hostages killed in Gaza. D’Souza recounted fear washing over him that perhaps Bar had been killed.
“My friends told me that perhaps his fate was sealed, but my mindset is that he is alive,” he said. “I told my friends: Bar is alive. He will return, he will return, he will return.”
