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A Kibbutz Be’eri Survivor Sits Down With the Settler Who Saved Her Life

The ideological distance between Rabbi Menachem Kalmanzon from the West Bank settlement of Otniel and Nili Bar Sini from Kibbutz Be’eri turned into a fateful alliance on October 7

גילי בר סיני והרב מנחם קלמנזון (צילום: עופר עמרם, סל הפקות)
Nili Bar Sini and Rabbi Menachem Kalmanzon in conversation at an October 7 memorial event. (Photo: Ofer Amram, Sal Productions)
By David Tversky

There is a deep ideological chasm between Nili Bar Sini from Kibbutz Be'eri, who has never visited the settlements in the West Bank, and Rabbi Menachem Kalmanzon from the Orthodox West Bank settlement of Otniel. Likewise, Kalmanzon had never visited the largely leftist kibbutz until Saturday afternoon, October 7, when he came to rescue Bar Sini from her home.

At an October 7 anniversary conference held in Sderot by the Kibbutz Movement, Yad Ya’ari Research and Documentation Center, and Yad Tabenkin Archives, the two met on stage for a joint discussion. Besides recalling the memories of horror and rescue, they sought to re-examine the tension between the kibbutz and the settler movements, which are regular ideological rivals.

Otniel is part of the Hebron Mountain regional council, whose elected leader is affiliated with Bezalel Smotrich’s extreme-right Religious Zionist Party. Founded in 1993, the illegal settlement is surrounded by Palestinian villages and has been the victim of multiple terror attacks over the decades.

Contrastingly, Kibbutz Be’eri is a traditional stronghold of the Israeli left. In the 2022 national elections, over a third of all residents voted for the Labor party, followed by 28% voting for the centrist Yesh Atid party, and 16% for the far-left Meretz party. Be’eri members were also active in Road to Recovery, an Israeli NGO which organizes Jewish volunteers to drive Palestinians from Gaza and the West Bank to Israeli hospitals for treatment.

In the wake of the massacre, a fateful alliance has formed between them, which could potentially evolve into a shared purpose.

“What actually brought you to our kibbutz that day?” Bar Sini asked.

“It’s simple. Elhanan brought me,” Kalmanzon replied.

Bar Sini survived the hell of Be’eri on October 7 and was rescued from her home thanks to Kalmanzon's arrival at the kibbutz. Her husband, Yoav, one of the architects of the kibbutz’s legendary printing house, was murdered.

Menachem Kalmanzon and his brother Elhanan arrived independently to Be'eri in the afternoon of October 7 to assist in the rescue efforts. The two rescued over 100 residents of the kibbutz. On the morning of October 8, during another rescue attempt, Elhanan encountered a terrorist in one of the houses, who opened fire on him, and he was killed on the spot. For their resourcefulness and bravery, they received the Israel Prize in May earlier this year.

A house in Kibbutz Be’eri which was damaged in the attack on October 7. (Photo: David Tversky).
A house in Kibbutz Be’eri which was damaged in the attack on October 7. (Photo: David Tversky).

“Elhanan had been involved in many security events and he never called me. I understood that since he suddenly called me, it was something important,” Kalmanzon said.

Kalmanzon recalled the events of the morning of October 7: “Many have asked me throughout the year, why did you come to the kibbutz? Why go rescue people in the kibbutz? That question really angers me. When we went to Be’eri, we didn’t feel like we were going to a place that was different from our own. We went to help our people. For me, we are one people on a shared path. How this path unfolds—whether as a fateful alliance or a shared destiny—is our challenge to resolve.”

Elhanan Kalmanzon, also a resident of Otniel, was a Mossad (Israeli intelligence agency) fighter who independently decided to head to the Gaza border area on October 7. Together with his brother Menachem, they entered Kibbutz Be’eri around six in the evening and joined the fighting and rescue efforts of the forces in the area, which enabled the rescue of Bar Sini, among others.

“At one point, Elhanan told me he didn’t want to go back into the bedlam, and I didn’t want to either. We thought about all our family members we had already lost in attacks in recent years. But then a man appeared at the kibbutz gate and told us, ‘My brother is there with his children, and he needs help.’ Elhanan looked at me and said, ‘Shall we go in?’ and I replied, ‘Let’s go in.’ When I heard that man talking about his family, I thought of my uncle, Michael Mark, of blessed memory, who was murdered by a terrorist in front of his children in 2016—this is our fateful alliance. But a fateful alliance is an easy story,” Kalmanzon said.

“Not exactly easy,” Bar Sini replied, “You were there, without the army, when we were left to our fate. You entered and exited and rescued people. You chose to do that.”

Bar Sini’s words, including the emphasis on the fact that the army did not arrive at the kibbutz while the Kalmanzon brothers did, reflect the deep crisis of trust between the kibbutz members and the army. Many of them have found themselves questioning the entire security plan which was supposed to protect them over the past decades. The arrival of the brothers, who represent a political community often perceived as an enemy, shattered perceptions among many kibbutz members, but also among settlers.

“I told myself that the reason I'm afraid to go in is the reason I must go in,” said Kalmanzon.

“I look at the family we rescued and see my own family,” he said. “The kibbutz is very similar to my home: a small settlement. No one knows addresses. Everyone knows everyone. Be’eri represents community, support, and a strong work ethic, just like Otniel. And I can say how significant community is in a person's life. Our family, thanks to our community, has managed to survive all the losses we've experienced over the years.”

Bar Sini entered the West Bank only once, right after the Six-Day War, out of curiosity.

“When the settlements began, it became political. The kibbutz ethos was somewhat stolen,” she says awkwardly, apologizing for not being politically correct as she wonders how people in Be’eri would react if the situation were reversed.

“We didn’t go back there because we didn’t feel it was ours. Now I ask myself, if it had been with you, how many of us would have gone to help? I really don't know how to answer.”

“In my reserve unit, there are many kibbutz members from Beit Alfa. I believe they would have come,” Kalmanzon replied.

To the audience, Kalmanzon humorously mentioned a friend from Otniel who reads the center-left newspaper Haaretz to improve his mood.

“Haaretz constantly writes that the settlers control everything; it’s wonderful,” he said to the audience’s laughter, “We have a problem when you see me only through Haaretz, and I have a problem if I see you only through [the conservative] channel 14.”

Since that fateful day, Kalmazon has formed many connections and friendships in the kibbutz. He is trying to understand what kind of alliance can develop between the two communities.

“We will need to reach compromises about our way of life,” Bar Sini said, “but so will you about yours.”

There is also a difficult, burning question about the continuation of the war and the hostage deal on the table. Kalmanzon is one of the founders of the Forum of Heroism, made up of bereaved families of fallen soldiers, which calls for maximizing the fight against Hamas, opposes ceasefires and the expansion of humanitarian aid, and, according to him, critiques the proposals presented in recent months for deals to release hostages.

“It angers me that we’ve been branded as against the deal; that’s not true,” he said, “We are in favor of a deal, but with question marks regarding the deal.”

“I met with families in the Hostage Families Forum, and we cried a lot,” he continued, “I told them about everyone I’ve lost. They shared about their loss. We don’t agree, but we also don’t sweep the disagreement under the rug. Over time, my opinions have shifted, and I feel their opinions have changed as well. We can discuss our differences.”

'It is clear to us that we can discuss,” Bar Sini said, “but can we reach a compromise, can we move?”

Kalmanzon replied, “Of course. It’s in our hands.”

This article was translated by Nancye Kochen.

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